The World According to Aargh

The Official Canadian Temperature Conversion Chart

50° Fahrenheit (10° C)

• New Yorkers try to turn on the heat.

• Canadians plant gardens.

40° Fahrenheit (4.4° C)

• Californians shiver uncontrollably.

• Canadians Sunbathe.

35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C)

• Italian Cars won’t start

• Canadians drive with the windows down

32° Fahrenheit (0 ° C)

• Distilled water freezes

• Canadian water get thicker.

0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C)

• New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.

• Canadians have the last cookout of the season.

-40° Fahrenheit (-40° C)

• Hollywood disintegrates.

• Canadians rent some videos.

-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)

• Mt. St. Helens freezes.

• Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door.

-100° Fahrenheit (-73° C)

• Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.

• Canadians pull down their ear flaps.

-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)

• Ethyl alcohol Freezes.

• Canadians get frustrated when they can’t thaw the keg.

-460° Fahrenheit (-273° C)

• Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops.

• Canadians start saying “cold, eh?”

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)

• Hell freezes over.

• The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.

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